I had to sacrifice everything I knew, the imaginary wall to move in the right direction, to take care of myself, my body, my mind, my spirit. I had to withdraw from the race, go the opposite way of the finish line back to the starting point. Some would say I was going backwards, but I knew going backwards actually meant I was going forwards.
Coming back to what you thought you already knew could teach you more than you thought you could ever know. When all of this is confirmed, one will find out the finish line and the starting point are illusions, the journey was all there was and ever will be, all you have to do is be, and by being you will always love and be loved, by being you will always be love.
I have been nominated for my first blog award. As I carry out my research on blog awards, I am excited to see the emphasis they place on helping bloggers get discovered. Almost everyday I come across a new blog with an abundance of beautiful creation just waiting for the world to see. I hope these awards can continue to shine the light on bloggers who have not yet been discovered. I was nominated this award by Brothers’ Campfire. Thank you!
Real Neat Blog Award Rules
Display the award logo
Thank the blogger who nominated you and link to their blog
Answer the questions from the blog who nominated you
Nominate seven to ten bloggers
Ask them seven questions
Brothers Campfire Questions
Tell me 5 things about yourself you want me to know, and 5 things you did not want me to know.
Five things about myself I want you to know
I love you
I enjoy reading posts from brothers campfire.
I have learned you can transcend by just being.
I enjoy three pillows when I sleep (one for between the legs, one for my head, one for my arm to hug)
Five things about myself I have worked on
Writing can be as vulnerable as you make it
Writing vulnerability can make the mind run laps
Writing can be tedious, fun, and exhausting
In high school I could eat two chipotle burritos with ease
Mind embedded in Velcro with love notes attached by scotch tape, written by me, written for my mind to always speak to me, good or bad, I will always be its counterpart. I will never eat until I can’t hear it, I will never drink until I can’t see it, I won’t hump until it is gone, I won’t snort until I am numb to it. I will hug it until it trusts. Although sometimes I will leave and detach, I will never abandon, for I know it always wants me to listen!
The city teaches shallow. If only I was as gorgeous as it, then people would love me. They would love me not for what I am, but they would love me for what I am worth. They would love me for the the things I own. They would love me for how I look. They wouldn’t love the deep depths of me I carry around on a daily basis. They wouldn’t love me for the battles in my head I have countlessly won day after day. They would love the surface. To them that is enough, to them they would die for that. The city doesn’t cheat artificial validation, but it does give glimpses of hope. Maybe if we swam to the center and understood the intentions of the foundation it was built on. Maybe if we looked at the ideas behind the madness and unmasked the core. Maybe too, we will glow like the city. We will stand out and reflect rays of sunshine the way the glass buildings do so on a breezy summer night. Maybe letting go is all we need. Maybe internal reflection is the key. Maybe dreams do come true. In the city I know they do.
Unfaithful kings and broken wings, I search for you to see the brighter things, cherish me in the crispiest cold springs, until love is served from what the sun brings, and men propose to angels with the prettiest rings.